UngsungBlog: A (Fantasy) Sports Blog

Quick-hitters:

- OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!! Eddie Izzard is going to be at the Kodak Theater in Hollywood from Thursday to Saturday, Aug 7-9!

MUST…GET…TIX!

The new show is called “Stripped,” for the record.

- I made some instant udon noodles for dinner tonight, and the cooking instructions said to boil 19 1/2 fl oz. of water (17.5 fl oz. if I chose to cook the noodles in the microwave).

19.5 fl oz? They couldn’t round it up to 2 1/2 cups? Too bad I don’t have a graduated cylinder. And what’s with directing me to cook the noodles for 5 minutes? Four minutes and 48 seconds would have been perfect.

- I forgot to mention one incident that happened during the Mets-Dodgers game last night. A woman wearing a Mets jersey was leaving the stadium, but not before getting into a mini-argument with a bunch of Dodger fans sitting a few rows in front of us. As soon as that happened, a bunch of Dodger fans started mercilessly booing her.

She turned around, and started speaking what could barely be considered English. I was able to make out something about “you” (Dodger fans, presumably) winning twice in “like a hundred years” while “we” (Mets fans) have won “so many” times.

If memory serves me correctly, the Los Angeles Dodgers have won two championships in their non-Brooklyn existence, and the Mets have won exactly twice as well. Now, if the woman is going to bandwagon and include the Yankees into that discussion, then I guess she has a point. Then again, including Yankees’ championships as a Mets fan is like being a Clipper fan celebrating Lakers’ championships.

I couldn’t help but join in on the heckling, shouting “Remember September of last year?” (in reference to the Mets’ late season collapse last year that cost them the NL East).

- I never did get around to commenting about the disputed shot in the third quarter of Game 2 between Orlando and Detroit, so I’ll let the guys over at Imaginary Hardwood explain why the disputed shot—a terrible mistake by the refs and clock operator, for the record—wasn’t the only reason for Orlando’s 2-0 deficit.

I’ll add this to the discussion, though: why couldn’t the refs start the entire play over again? Reset the clock, and make Detroit bring the ball back up court? What is wrong with that? And I don’t want to hear the nonsense that the refs “knew” that 4.6 seconds (or whatever it was) elapsed from inbounds to shot, thus allowing the basket to stand. Yeah, I’m so sure the refs knew that 4.6, and not 4.5 or 4.7 seconds, ran off the clock. I would have respected their opinion, as wrong as it ended up being, if they had said that five seconds ran off the clock.

ESPN’s TMQ has ranted about tenths of seconds often, and I wholeheartedly agree. Sure, without tenths of seconds, Laker fans might not have Derek Fisher’s “0.4″ shot, but with the proposal I will offer below, he might have had “more” time to take that shot.

I propose that the NBA should get rid of the clock readings of tenths of seconds. If they insist on having fractions of seconds, why not use half-seconds instead?

(Try this exercise: randomly start and stop a stopwatch, and guess how much time elapsed for five trials of varying durations, to the nearest tenth. Now, repeat the trial, and see how many you can get to the nearest half-second. I tried it just right now, and scored 1/5 on the first test; 3/5 on the second test. Of course, it doesn’t take a genius to realize that one is probably going to score better on the second test.)

Wouldn’t identifying “five and a half seconds” make a lot more sense than trying to determine if 5.3 or 5.4 seconds ran off the clock instead?

- Despite getting out to a big double-digit lead early, and keeping it for most of the game, I still saw a lot of chinks in the Lakers’ armor after their Game 2 win over Utah. Deron Williams was an absolute beast in the third quarter, and Paul Millsap might be the key to Utah evening the series in the next two games. I could’ve sworn that every basket Millsap scored was an and-1. If Carlos Boozer and Andrei Kirilenko were able to give the Jazz anything decent in the first two games, this series could easily be 1-1 or 2-0, Utah.

Fisher was huge, Gasol was solid—and I think the Lakers need to establish him more often—and Odom was great. Even still, the third-quarter stretch where both teams were scoring on practically every possession has to be worrisome to the Lakers; you better believe that the Jazz will get stops in Utah. I don’t expect the Lakers to shoot 57% in either Games 3 or 4.

I missed most of the bore-fest that was Detroit-Orlando, but hopefully Chauncey Billups is able to play Game 4. If he’s not, Detroit is going to be in for one heck of a series.

Until next time!

Tags: Food, Random, Sports by Peter
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Argh! I thought I just had a headache, but I guess I am full-blown sick! Sore throat, runny nose…good thing I still have two bags of cough drops from CVS (free after ECBs, naturally).

- It’s time…for some Dodgers love.

(I swear I’m not a bandwagon-er, even though it may appear that way because this is the first real Dodgers blog entry I’ve made this year.)

Rafael Furcal has to be the early favorite for NL MVP, right? No, I’m not saying this as a homer. I’m not saying this after watching Furcal tattoo a three-run, game-breaking HR against Colorado. And I’m not saying this as a fan of the guy himself. I’m saying this based on his stats YTD:

(as of 5/1/08) .370/.457/.580. 28 R, 44 H, 12 2B, 2 3B, 3 HR, 11 RBI, 18 BB. Second in NL in AVG, fourth in steals (7), top ten in OPS (1.036), and first in runs. Never mind all the SportsCenter-caliber plays he makes at shortstop. Is it no coincidence that his play is a key reason for the Dodgers’ six game winning streak?

Reports say that Furcal is open to offers for a contract extension mid-season. Can you blame the Dodgers for trying to re-sign him? Think he’ll take a three-year extension worth $48 million? Yeah, I know…$16 million for a SS who will be 34 at the end of the contract? I could think of bigger wastes of money.

(Tangent: I actually took a few minutes to decide which player I would associate with the word “wastes” above. It should really only have taken a few seconds; Schmidt has been injured, while Jones couldn’t get a hit if he were swinging a tennis racket.)

(Tangent #2: Did I just Ung-hex the Dodgers? It’s now Dodgers 7, Rockies 6. Whoops!)

- Raise your hand if you had the Atlanta-Boston series going more than five games.

If your hand is raised, you’re a Hawks fan (do those exist?), a damn liar, stoned out of your mind, or you own a time machine, went to the future, and saw Atlanta winning Game Six at home on May 2, 2008.

(Tangent: Why is it that, during the “NBA Cares” mini-commercials that air during the playoffs, do we hardly see the superstar players participating? ESPN just aired one such commercial, and Kyle Korver (!!!) was the guest. Was Deron Williams busy that night? Was Carlos Boozer having dinner with family that day?

I kid, of course. What the NBA has done for New Orleans is, in a word, remarkable.)

As I was watching the fourth quarter of the Celtics-Hawks game, one thought came to mind: “THIS team won only 35 games in the regular season?” People slammed the Hawks for taking Al Horford over Mike Conley, Jr., but Horford’s been real strong in this series. Naturally, I gotta ask: What if the Hawks had drafted Chris Paul? And why did I continue to see Ray Allen on Joe Johnson? Is Doc trying to get himself run out of town?

(Off-topic: Andruw Jones just doubled??? The world is going to end! His batting average probably just increased ten points with that one hit.)

Do the Hawks have a chance in hell of upsetting Boston in Game Seven? Why not? Do I think they’ll win? Of course not.

By the way, T-Mac is having a hell of a first half against Utah—10-16, 28/7/3—and I’d love to see Houston force a Game Seven against Utah. It’s gonna be hard to do so, though, sans Rafer Alston. Had he been healthy for the whole series, would this game be an elimination game for Utah? Also, LeBron went LeBron, manned up, and ousted Washington with a triple-double. I dare the Boston-Atlanta winner to start trashing LeBron.

(OT: It appears that the Ung-hex has been averted, thanks to a bases-clearing double by Matt Kemp. Whew.)

More playoff thoughts next time, but until then, let me wrap up with this:

- So as you loyal UngsungBlog readers—all none of you—know, my sister has karmic powers. Evidently, either I have yet to learn to stop picking on her, or I like letting karma kick me in the ass.

Well, as we were preparing to head back to MPK last Friday, my sister remarked that she was expecting a phone call from someone, but her phone wasn’t not in her possession. Standing right in front of our sofa, I asked where her phone was, and she explained that she had left it in her car.

I jokingly exclaimed that leaving her phone in her car was “foolish,” and immediately turned around to get something. That’s when I discovered that my sister had left my poker chip set besides the sofa, hidden under a blanket which hung over the sofa.

How did I know the poker chip set was there? Well, one nano-mill-second after I insulted my sister and turned around, my right foot Vanderjerked the hidden poker chip set.

(Vanderjerk, v., to kick something hard, either accidentally or not at all straight, named after former Indianapolis Colts idiot kicker Mike Vanderjagt: My nephew spilled his juice all over our carpet, so I disciplined him by Vanderjerking him in the butt.)

I screamed out in pain, bent over, and was immediately half-crying and half-laughing; crying because it hurt like a mother, and laughing because what happened was so ridiculous. My sister got a good laugh for about five minutes, and I thought it was a bit funny for a few seconds. Too bad my foot hurt for a good day or two.

Will I learn my lesson? Maybe when the Clippers win an NBA title.

One last parting thought: what the hell happened in the third quarter? I guess the Lakers better prepare for a Game One on Sunday.

Tags: Random, Sports by Peter
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No quick-hitters tonight; I’ll save them for next time.

- While it was fun to see my three-year-old (not four yet, as I said earlier!) nephew this past weekend, I also got a headache from seeing him.

I constantly had to remind myself that he was a three-year-old.  Whining, crying, bitching…and that was just my reactions to his behavior!

It was good to see the kid again, though, even though he is much too smart for his own good.

(Tangent:  I found out, this weekend, that my laptop’s lid could support the weight of a small child!

How did I find out?  Well, my nephew thought it would be fun to crawl over my laptop—it was laying on the carpet, in front of me.  As soon as I heard the lid buckle, I instinctively shoved the kid off my laptop (I might have shoved him a good three feet; I forget how strong I am at times), fired it up, and was relieved to see it boot up.

Who needs a Panasonic toughbook? :P)

- I can’t believe nobody took my bet regarding the XG/MGE fiasco I’ve been dealing with over the past year:

I’ll lay 2-1 odds to anybody who is willing to bet that I will, within the next four weeks, receive the second rebate check.

Anyone who would have taken the bet would be counting his/her money right about now.  On Thursday, I got the second XG/MGE Company check for $19 that was owed to me!

Finally, I can close this dark chapter of my life :P.

- Time Warner keeps advertising on my television that they do not nickel-and-dime like the phone companies do.  I can attest to that!  I don’t think Time Warner has ever nickel-and-dimed me.

Case in point:  my Time Warner bill has gone up from $61, to $65, to $72, in a span of three months!  That’s no nickel-and-diming; that’s a pretty significant rate hike, no?

Kudos, Time Warner, for keeping your word and not nickel-and-diming customers.

By the way, on my most recent bill, there was this gem:

“This statement reflects your new 2008 pricing as previously communicated.  Please see the next page for the new pricing.”

Either Time Warner “communicated” this new pricing scheme via telepathy, or they issued a statement regarding these price increases via television…during the latter part of last week, when my TV signal and internet connection were flaky as hell.  By “flaky,” of course, I mean “works for ten minutes, and then goes out for two hours.”  Of course, there’s also the possibility that Time Warner NEVER SENT ME ANYTHING REGARDING THESE PRICE INCREASES.

All I know for sure is that Road Runner (Time Warner’s HSI) used to cost me $34.99 a month, then it went up to $39.99 a month last month, and now it’s costing me $44.99 a month.  Remember, though:  Time Warner doesn’t nickel-and-dime, and they certainly didn’t do so here!

I’ll update my List soon.

- Finally, I’ve been hearing all NBA season that this year’s playoffs were going to be the most competitive playoffs of all time.  The Eastern Conference first-round didn’t look compelling, save the Washington-Cleveland series, but wasn’t the Western Conference first-round supposed to be all potential seven-game series?  Weren’t we supposed to see at least one “upset” in the making?  Wasn’t Denver’s 1-2 scoring duo of Melo and AI supposed to push the Lakers?  Weren’t the Hornets supposed to be too young to contend against the Mavs?  Weren’t the new-look Suns supposed to push around the suddenly-aging Spurs (save for tonight)?

I see three 3-1 series leads for the favorites, and a series heading for a four game sweep.  Yes, I’m burying the Nuggets right now.  What a horrible performance by the Nuggets’ stars on Saturday!

BTW, Melo, “we” didn’t quit…at least, not all at the same time.  It sure looked like YOU quit first, and then your team followed suit.  I guess coach George Karl better start updating his resume, and either AI or Melo better start packing their bags.  Clearly the Melo/AI experiment is NOT working.

Other random NBA playoff thoughts:

1) What took so long for the Suns to show something against the Spurs?  Could they be working a miracle comeback?

(Nah.)

2) T-Mac, enjoy your vacation.  Maybe you and Gilbert Arenas could go fishing together or something.  They could take coaches Karl, D’Antoni, and Avery Johnson with them!

(Tangent:  Is D’Antoni really on the chopping block if the Suns get eliminated?  Last I checked, he wasn’t the one that traded for Shaq!)

3) Anyone see Al Horford smack-talking the Celtics after Atlanta’s Game 3 victory?  I thought Joakim Noah was the “vocal” one of Florida’s two championship teams of not so long ago.

4) Raise your hand if you didn’t know that Toronto and Orlando were facing each other.

The NHL playoffs couldn’t find the Tor-Orl series on TV.

I’m tired, so that’s all I’ve got for tonight.  No NFL Draft thoughts, by the way, for no reason in particular.

Tags: Cust. Service, Deals, Random, Sports by Peter
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Part 3 of the weekend blog will have to wait a night.

Quick-hitters:

- For you people that play sports—recreationally, or organized, no matter—don’t you love it when you hit “The Zone?” Nothing can go wrong: every shot you make falls, every swing you take is pure, every pass you make is on the money, every catch you make is crisp. Don’t you just love the feeling?

I wish I knew what that feeling was like

My sister and I “played” some tennis earlier today, and I use the term “play” loosely. We sucked. Bad.

I think I’ll stick to Wii Tennis.

- First, let me revisit the hot topic of a few nights ago: the Kirilenko flop (item #7). Most opinions I’ve heard insist that Kirilenko flopped, and that the call was so outrageous, the NBA should consider an “unsportsmanlike conduct” penalty on any player that flops so egregiously.

Rumor has it that Big Wilting Cactus Shaq O’Neal would be in favor of this rule change.

I’ve since seen the replay several times, and yes, Kirilenko absolutely flopped. That does NOT change the fact that Scola’s arm was extended when it made contact with Kirilenko. My point is, if illegal picks are offensive fouls, then Luis Scola committed an offensive foul. If Scola didn’t commit a foul, then what was the purpose of the extension of the arm? I find it hard to believe that Scola did not attempt to gain some advantage by the arm extension.

As far as penalizing flopping is concerned, I don’t see how the NBA could ever do this, unless they add a fourth official to the court. The three officials have enough trouble as it is with calling games (with some exceptions, of course; any time LeBron James is breathed on, that’s a foul, e.g.); how are they going to determine whether or not a player intentionally flopped?

Long story short, Houston should probably have pulled out game 2, and now they are in serious trouble.

- I took advantage of a JetBlue promotion to score LA Dodger tickets for Wednesday night’s game @ $5 each (Lower reserve, AKA one step below nosebleeds) + all of TicketMaster’s bullshit fees (more on this later).

Unfortunately, I didn’t find out until Tuesday that the Denver-Lakers game was scheduled at 7:30PM that Wednesday night. I decided that I wanted to record the game, but because I don’t have TiVo, I decided that I was going to use an ancient technology—one that my parents used!—to record the game.

You young folks may or may not have heard of this technology, but I was forced to use a VCR to record the game. What’s a VCR, you ask? Go look it up yourself

It took me twenty minutes just to set up the damn thing, plus another ten minutes to figure out how to program the VCR to record TNT.

(I’m watching the game right now, and I am crying over the fact that the recording is not in HD…)

The game itself was pretty good—Dodgers won!—but it went seriously downhill after four innings, when I’m guessing that “Couples Night” officially started. Three pairs of loudmouth couples sat in the two rows of seats almost directly in front of us, and when they started boozing up, they got even more obnoxious. They were text messaging, kissing, hugging, cursing, and generally being jerks.

Dodger fans, for the most part, ARE jerks, but it’s one thing to be jerks to the other team, and it’s completely another to be jerks to the patrons around you.

(A bit off topic…midway through the game, the scoreboard flashed the Lakers-Nuggets half time score, and the crowd gave a standing ovation at the sight of 59-49, Lakers. The roars got even louder when the final score was shown.)

- Speaking of the Dodgers, is it OK to cut a player in late April who makes $18 million a year? Seriously, I didn’t expect the Andruw Jones of old to show up when we signed him to that now-ridiculous two-year, $36 million deal. On the other hand, I wasn’t expecting Jones to hit .150, get horribly booed every time he makes an out, and get a sarcastic (or maybe not) standing ovation when he ends a hitless night with a single in his fifth at-bat.

Seriously, $36 million for a guy that should be hitting ninth? $36 million for a guy that can’t hit a fastball, and compensates by chasing pitches out of the strike zone? $36 million for a guy who I expect to make out each time he comes up, to the point where I had to beg him to just not ground into a double play? Why the hell did we sign this guy?

After his second strikeout of the game, it finally came to me: the Dodgers signed Andruw Jones to make Juan Pierre look like a viable everyday player! That HAS to be the reason, right? Sooner or later, Torre’s going to realize that Juan Pierre needs to be out there every night, right? I’d rather have Juan-for-four Pierre with 1 SB playing than Andruw “$19 million a year for a defensive stalwart in CF” Jones, that’s for sure.

Is it too late to write-off Jones’ salary as a charitable contribution from the Dodgers?

Tags: Random, Sports by Peter
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Quick-hitters:

- Wanna know how much stuff I have to blog about? My weekend blog will now be split into THREE entries, instead of two!

Too bad I didn’t participate in the IMBC this year :P.

- I nominate this guy for Idiot of the Day honors. Did the moron really expect the person who caught the ball below him to throw the ball back up there?

I bet he’ll hold on to the next foul ball he catches with two hands…assuming he actually catches another foul ball in his life.

- I’ve got a couple stupid-driver stories to share that my sister and I encountered over the past few days:

1) We were ready to make a right turn on to a two-lane street, but the light was red. Oncoming traffic prevented us from making the turn, so we waited for the light to turn green.

That’s when the moron behind us honked for the first time.

When the light finally turned green, a pedestrian started walking from the opposite corner. We decided to let the pedestrian—an older woman, IIRC—reach the other end of the crosswalk before we turned.

One the pedestrian was completely across, we made our turn, and I told my sister, “I bet the guy behind us is going to pass us.” Sure enough, he did, but not before honking at us again right when he got beside our car!

2) Back in MPK, we got off the freeway, and turned on to a residential (one lane) street. That’s when a car, most likely a ricer, began tailgating us.

For five blocks.

When we were about a block from where we needed to turn, we were stuck behind two really slow-moving cars. That’s when the dumbass behind us started flashing his lights at us. Ok…what, exactly, are you trying to accomplish?

When we finally made our turn, I looked back, and saw the idiot pass the two slow-moving cars on the right (remember, we were on a one-lane, two-way street).

Have I ever mentioned how much I hate stupid people?

- Today, I decided to try Pizza Hut’s new Tuscani Pastas (my first mistake?); Pizza Hut is running a promo where you get a free Pizza Mia pizza—terrible stuff, by the way—with the purchase of a Tuscani Pasta dish. I opted for the Creamy Chicken, and was pleasantly surprised to find out that it was not terrible!

(Tangent: Has anyone seen the commercial for this stuff, where people are taken to a fancy restaurant and are tricked into believing that they are eating some gourmet pasta? And when the ruse was up, one guy declared that he loved the pasta even more?

Does anyone think that the surroundings might have had something to do with the people’s perception of the pasta? Are potatoes au gratin really that much better at a fancy steakhouse than at a place like TGIF, or are they better because you had to pay $7 for the potatoes, in addition to your steak?)

The sauce tasted about as good as the typical jar of Alfredo sauce, and clearly, the dish isn’t worth close to $12 if you make it yourself. However, considering that I was expecting the pasta to taste like $1 frozen entree pasta, I was pleased that the pasta wasn’t all that terrible.

Would I pay $12 for this stuff again? Hell no.

- Finally, some quick (and not so quick) thoughts on the NBA Playoffs to date:

1) Tim Duncan: 40 pts, 15 boards? A game-tying 3 to send the game into double-OT? And that was a game 1? Why the hell was I not watching the game?

Oh yeah…Mom’s birthday lunch. Duh.

2) Does LeBron James play small forward or wide receiver? The last time I saw an NBAer get beat up that much in a game, Doug Christie’s wife was nearby.

And DeShawn Stevenson is an idiot, plain and simple. Would the casual fan even know who he is if he had not mouthed off about LeBron?

3) Has Detroit’s alarm clock gone off yet? How the hell did Detroit lose to Philly?

4) Boston? Yawn.

5) That big fellow in Orlando? Not bad.

6) Experience, shm-experience. Just ask Chris Paul and his Hornets how valuable experience is.

7) I guess Tracy McGrady can start planning a summer fishing trip now. Seriously, is this guy ever going to get out of the first round of the NBA playoffs?

(EDIT: The Rockets are saying that Andrei Kirilenko flopped on the decisive play of the game; Luis Scola appeared to push Kirilenko out of the play, right before T-Mac passed the ball to a wide-open Bobby Jackson for a game-tying triple. Both coach Rick Adelman and T-Mac insisted that “they [the refs] can’t make that call.”

Um, did you guys not see Scola’s arm clearly extended, making contact with Kirilenko? Yeah, I do believe the refs should have made that call.

EDIT #2: Upon further review, yes, Kirilenko flopped. That doesn’t change the fact that Scola extended his arm to make the pick, which is still an illegal play.)

And finally,

either Pau Gasol and the Lakers better send Memphis a huge fruit basket, or at least a Thank You card. I understand that Gasol—36/16/8/3, all team highs, if that’s any good—and the Lakers were playing the enver (yes, typo intentional) Nuggets, but that was still one hell of a performance by the previously winless-in-the-playoffs Gasol.

Throughout the game, I kept preaching to my sister, “Zero footers: good; twenty footers: not so good.” How many dunks did Gasol have in Game 1? A thousand?

I expect Denver to play with a bigger lineup in Game 2—Kobe’s not going to have another crap game, right?—but I’m still not sure if that will make a difference. I just don’t see Denver, even with Carmelo and AI, being able to keep up with the Lakers in scoring, especially inside.

IF (and that’s a huge IF) the Lakers win the NBA championship, Memphis has to get a playoff share of the revenue, right?

Tags: Food, Random, Sports by Peter
4 Comments »

Quick-hitters:

- Current rebate-o-meter: $1,740, though $60 of that almost never reached my bank account (more on that later).

- I see that there are eleven left in the IMBC.

Amy, you might as well give up now…you have no shot of winning!

- It’s time for another installment of UBMe!

It is a beautiful day today, so you decide to get out of the house As you head for the parking lot, you stop by your mailbox—it’s a typical apartment mailbox; small, rectangular, barely large enough to hold a single brick in it. You open it, and find two bubble mailers and the Wall Street Journal that you know your sister no longer reads.

(Background: My sister subscribes to the WSJ, but for some reason, the WSJ delivery guys don’t have a key to get in to our complex. Therefore, they have to deliver the paper with the normal mail, and, according to my sister, we always get the previous day’s paper with the current day’s mail. Since my sister doesn’t bother reading the WSJ, I usually just toss it.)

You grab the folded paper, check between the fold—you know your mail carrier likes to fold the paper around your other mail—find nothing there, and proceed to toss the paper into the nearby trash can. Upon tossing the paper, you see the pages of the folded paper fan open…and a rebate check pokes its head out between two pages!

You grab the paper from the trash can, and find the rest of your mail shoved inside the newspaper: two more rebate checks, a credit card bill, and some junk mail! If you had just blindly tossed the paper into the trash can, all of that mail would have been lost!

I guess my mail carrier missed the fold itself, and accidentally inserted the mail between pages of the paper. It’s a damn good thing I noticed it when I chucked the paper. Now I gotta wonder: have I thrown away other mail in a similar fashion?

- Have you ever watched a baseball game and cringed when a batter fouls a pitch off, and the ball caroms into one of his legs? With the exception of the shot to the package, I’d have a hard time arguing that there is anything more painful in baseball than that.

I mentioned that it was a beautiful day today, so we decided to swing by the local family fun center for some batting practice and, if time permitted, some miniature golf. While watching my sister all but bunt her allotment of slow-pitch softball tosses, she popped one up in her immediate vicinity. Taking cover as if she heard a gunshot, I quipped “Isn’t that what the helmet is for?”

When it was my turn to hit, I decided to start with the slow-pitch cage as a warm-up. If you don’t mind my saying, I was raking pretty well; I made excellent contact with several of the pitches without whiffing on a single pitch.

(I know, I know…bragging about hitting slow-pitch tosses. How impressive!)

The batting cages used to be $2 for a token (20 pitches); it’s now $3 for a token (though now you get 30 pitches, so at least it comes out to the same cost per pitch). I remembered having enough trouble with twenty pitches—I’d tire out at around 15 or so—and I was feeling especially tired near the round of 30. When pitch #29 came, I took a giant swing at it, and knew immediately that I hit the top of the ball.

How did I know? I fouled the pitch RIGHT OFF THE TOP OF MY RIGHT FOOT, right on top of my shoe laces (I hit right-handed, so that was my back foot). YEOW!!!

I let out a painful scream, tried to regain my composure, and could only very weakly swing at the next pitch. I was in so much pain that I couldn’t raise my left foot off the ground! Fortunately, that was also the last pitch of that round.

I limped out of the batting cages, limped towards the bench outside the cage, and immediately began massaging my foot. Fortunately, the foul ball didn’t leave a bruise, although I still feel pain in the foot.

Moral of the story: I can insult my sister, but at serious risk to my own health. Clearly, I still have not learned my lesson.

- Finally, I just have to end today’s blog with a…um…intriguing sight I saw at 99 Ranch today.

(Disclaimer: The following may be offensive to some. You have been warned.)

I was at the butcher’s section of the store, strolling about with my shopping cart, when I noticed a petite Asian woman standing quite oddly. And by “quite oddly,” I mean that she was sticking her chest out about as far as anatomically possible. Strange, I thought…

Robin Williams, in Live on Broadway, once quipped that he saw a woman that had such a bad boob job that, when she turned in a different direction, her boobs stayed in the same direction. Let’s put it this way: it looked like she was wearing a breast plate under her shirt; she turned, and those things didn’t move. I figured they were made out of Kevlar; a bullet wouldn’t have stood a chance! The woman looked soooooooo uncomfortable standing there, and it’s not like she had C or D cups!

Once I found the item I was looking for—chicken breasts, interestingly enough—I went down a couple aisles to where my sister was shopping, and before I could ask her if she saw the girl, she immediately asked me if I noticed her!

Bring on the hate mail!

Tags: Random, Sports, UBMe by Peter
1 Comment »

Quick-hitters:

- Since when have those Google AdSense banners had the left/right arrows?

(Wait a sec…most of you probably have AdBlock enabled to block AdSense ads anyway, so why bother mentioning this? :P)

- Crystal Light is awesome. I can satisfy my sweet tooth at only five calories a serving? Plus, this stuff will make me drink more water? Great!

(Then again, water consumption for me is not a problem in the spring/summer months, though. I think I drink triple the water during the spring/summer months as I do during the cooler months.)

As great as Crystal Light is, I think I’m drinking a bit too much of the stuff. And by “a bit too much,” I mean three quarts over the last two days. Granted, three quarts of my Crystal Light = two quarts normally, but that doesn’t change the opinion that my body probably doesn’t appreciate the massive influx of artificial sweetener that I’ve ingested recently. Hopefully my recent consumption was only an aberration…can I blame Sprint for this? Besides, you’re supposed to drink at least two quarts of water per day, right?

(EDIT:  I wrote the above three days ago, and I haven’t finished a pitcher of Crystal Light since.)

- Before I get into my NCAA Championship Game thoughts, I just read that UCLA is reportedly going to lose Kevin Love and Darren Collison.  Love leaving doesn’t surprise me at all, but after seeing Collison’s performance against Memphis, I was a bit surprised to see that, assuming the reports are true, he was making himself draft-eligible.

I’m guessing we’ll hear that Russell Westbrook will be gone soon enough.

- My NCAA Championship Game thoughts:

1) You’ll make FTs when they matter, eh, Calipari?  One of five down the stretch, including a huge offensive rebound off a missed freebie?  Misses by your two stud guards?

I guess the Ung-hex couldn’t overcome Memphis’ free throw shooting woes.

Memphis absolutely choked, plain and simple.  How do you blow a nine-point lead with two minutes to play?  I hope Calipari is getting some studs next year, as he’s clearly going to have to replace his starting back court next year.  Derrick Rose probably leaped over Michael Beasley as the #1 prospect on most teams’ draft boards, after that superhuman second-half run of his.

2) What play was worse?  The awful turnover that led to a clutch trey by Kansas, or Derrick Rose not fouling late, allowing Mario Chalmers to (eventually) put up the game-tying three at the end of regulation?

The TO was bad, but the non-foul was much, much worse.  Once Kansas G Sherron Collins got past half court, where was the foul?  Even if Collins made both FTs, and Memphis missed both—Memphis was in the double bonus by then—Kansas would have had ~ 4 seconds to advance the ball and put up a shot.

That foul by Joey Dorsey wasn’t at all costly either, was it?  Raise your hand if you think Memphis could have used him in OT.

3) After two relative stinkers in the Final Four, at least the championship game was watchable, and at least it had one super-memorable moment:  Chalmers’ triple to send the game in OT.

I can’t wait for next year.

- My loyal readers—all none of you—know that one of my biggest pet peeves are idiots that do stupid things with shopping carts.  Well, my sister and I had to go run some errands earlier this past evening, so we headed out to Costco first.  We were planning on getting a few items:  some spices, salad, cottage cheese, cucumbers, and one or two other things.

Of course, when one goes to Costco to buy “one or two other things,” he inevitably ends up buying 6-8 other things.   Have I ever mentioned that Costco is evil?

Anyway, on our way back to our car, I noticed a shopping cart “corral” (my term) a couple spots away.  That’s when I noticed a cart placed PERPENDICULAR to the front of the corral!!!

(Costco shopping cart corrals are double-laned; they are designed to take in two rows of shopping carts…assuming morons don’t block both lanes with a single cart.)

Are you freaking serious?  You couldn’t have been bothered to turn the cart ninety degrees, much less push the damn cart into one of the two lanes?  Was there an event that you absolutely had to tend to that prevented you from spending three seconds to properly secure the cart into the corral?

I expected this behavior at my local supermarket, but at a Costco?

After Costco, we went to VONS to go get some protein bars ($1 each - $1.50 off wyb 2 coupon - $1 double = $0.50 overage for two bars).  Again, we intended on buying only a couple of items, and you know what happened next.  When we walked out of the store, I glanced over at the shopping cart corral in that parking lot, and couldn’t believe what I saw.

Apparently, some moron decided to leave his cart just outside the corral.  I should give him some credit, though; at least the cart was pointed right in front of the corral.  However, that wasn’t the ridiculous part!  Two other morons decided to attach their carts to the first one, without even thinking about pushing the carts into the corral!  What I would have given to be there to see this actually unfold in front of my very eyes!

I hope each moron that did this crash into a shopping cart the next time they’re at a supermarket.

Until next time!

Tags: Food, Random, Sports by Peter
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Sorry…only one topic tonight (and when you read it, you’ll see why.)

Quick-hitters:

- Amy got lucky. She actually posted a blog entry on day 1 of this year’s IMBC.

She’s not going to last :P.

- My UPS guy’s a comedian. He swung by around 7PM tonight to drop off a package. When I opened the door, he handed me a small, Tyvek-bagged package from Buy.com. He then started snickering, and told me “Don’t take this the wrong way, but…you have a small package.”

(groan…)

One of these days, I’m going to have to tell him that he’s paid to deliver my packages, not to crack jokes :P.

- Current rebate-o-meter: $1,760. I got a couple hundred bucks last week, and very quickly added a couple hundred back to the running total.

- So at around 8:30PM tonight, I got a call from my 11-year-old cousin, and I knew exactly what the call was about.

(Background: Over the weekend, my aunt asked me for recommendations on new cell phone service. I immediately mentioned SERO—500 minutes, 7pm nights, free wireless web, etc., for $30—and explained that while SERO was a great value, you get what you pay for. Anyone who has ever dealt with Sprint CS knows exactly what I’m talking about.)

He explained to me that the phone did not work. Assuming this was nothing more than an ambiguity, I asked my cousin to power on the phone. He did so, and then asked me what the phone number on the new account was. I asked him to read a ten digit number off the box of the phone—a Palm Centro—and he started “8-1-8…”

Now I made sure to request a 626 number, and the two contact numbers I left when signing up for the SERO line were also 626 numbers, so why the hell did Sprint give her an 818 number???

Back to the phone itself…eventually it dawned upon me that not only did we have to turn on the device itself, but we also had to turn on the phone capabilities in order to make calls. I had my cousin hit the phone button on the Centro, and was already patting myself on the back, when my cousin told me that he got a message along the lines of “your account is not authorized to make this phone call.”

-bang- -bang- -bang-

I asked for my aunt’s PIN, and called Sprint Customer Service to see if they could figure out what was going on. I got an Indian guy with a heavy accent, and I knew I was in for a headache or three. I first pointed out that I was not calling about the line of service from which I was making this call—I was using my Sprint phone—and I wanted to know why my aunt’s phone was not working. The rep, clearly mistaken, kept asking about what I would need to do to add a second line of service! Three times I explained that I was not looking to add a line of service, and three times he replied, “I know sir…” followed by “If you want to add a new line of service…”

-bang- -bang- -bang-

Once I straightened him out, he then explained that it appeared that the line was not activated. I quickly mentioned that every SERO line I’ve opened or helped someone open came activated, but he insisted that it was not. Sure enough, a quick Google search pointed out that sometimes Sprint doesn’t activate the line of service before shipping. Ok…my fault.

I then asked him about the issue of the phone number. The rep explained that Sprint uses the phone numbers that a customer provides as a guideline, but they really try to give users a number that gives them the best quality of service.

For your information, the number of reference that I gave Sprint is located in La Puente, CA. The number that they gave us is located in Van Nuys, CA. As you can see here, Sprint did a great job giving my aunt a number as close to local as possible, wouldn’t you say? Thirty-six miles…not exactly “close,” I’d say.

I screamed, “How is a totally different area code ‘close’???” The rep explained again that the number they issued was as close to local as they could have provided. Seriously, Sprint? I’m surprised they didn’t give my aunt a 909 #, or a 714 #.

Several other times throughout the conversation, the rep kept giving me blatantly conflicting information (”Yes, you can.” “No, you can’t.”). Not to mention, the rep often used words like “probably” and “possibly.” I don’t want to hear that I can possibly avoid paying the ETF if I cancelled the contract right away! I would like to know if I could definitely avoid said fees! At times during the conversation, it sounded like the rep was sarcastically talking about my “aunt,” almost as if she didn’t exist. That was really apparent at the beginning of the call, when he kept talking about adding (raise your fingers and do the quote-sign in the air here) “my aunt” to my existing line.

After about fifteen minutes of frustration, I bluntly asked “How does your 30 day trial work?” He explained that I could cancel the line of service at any time within the first 30 days, and the ETF would be waived, and I would only be responsible for a fraction of the monthly costs. I then asked, “If the line has not yet been active, will I have to pay anything?”

“Of course not, sir! Why would you have to pay for anything if the line isn’t active?”

(Something tells me that a Sprint rep is going to “accidentally” activate the service before I attempt to cancel. Also, this was the time where I started getting a steady dose of conflicting information.)

Near the end of our conversation, the rep tried to transfer me to the Activation hotline. I kept asking other questions, including what I could do about the phone number mishap. The rep explained that I could “try” to change the number. Thanks!

When everything was said and done, he asked me again if I wanted to be transferred to the Activation hotline. I asked him for the direct number, as I planned on doing a three-way call with my aunt so that she could provide the rep with all the information they need to activate the phone (ESN, e.g.). He eventually gave me the number, and then offered to transfer me again.

(sigh…)

When I set up the conference call with the Activation hotline, I found out that they were closed. Gee, rep, couldn’t you have told me this earlier??? Worse yet, as I was going through the automated menu, they asked me for my aunt’s PIN, which I punched in.

“Sorry. The information you have provided does not match our records.”

(At this point, would you have blamed me if I threw my laptop across the room?)

I told my aunt that I would contact the Activation hotline tomorrow, and she seemed to take it well. Personally, I wouldn’t have blamed her if she disowned me right on the spot :P.

Obviously, abusing the Ung-hex has karmic consequences :P.

EDIT: I’m fully aware of the Sprint/Consumerist Hotline, and that will be my next avenue, if I don’t cancel the line of service outright.

Tags: Cust. Service, Random by Peter
3 Comments »

Quick-hitters:

- Actual conversation between myself and my mother, over the weekend:

Her:  When are you going to go to [place] to visit [unnamed individual]?

Me:  Not sure.

Her:  Let’s go there next year.

(Note #1:  Read this.

Note #2:   I don’t recall inviting my mom to come with me!  Besides, who the heck travels with their mother???)

Me:  Sure, you can go.  By the way, [unnamed individual] told me to tell you to bring your frying pan if you’re going to stay with him.

Her:  *SMACK*

- New TV, or new laptop?  New laptop, or new TV?

That is the question.  I probably “need” a new TV more than a new laptop, but I wouldn’t mind a new laptop with a much better processor than the Pentium Dual-Crap that’s sitting in my laptop right now.

Maybe I should just steal my sister’s new Vostro.

- In an UngsungBlog first, Amy requested an Ung-hex on someone (typos corrected):

even if you don’t participate you should make a fantasy, bracket thingy for the IMBC‘ers.  place that ung-hex early!

Hmmm…I don’t think I’ve ever Ung-hexed an entire group, save one.  I should check the IMBC rules to see if acts of paranormal intervention are not allowed.

In any case, here goes:

I would imagine that Hank has to be favored to win again this year.  If not Hank, I’ll predict that someone that participated last year—Amy excepted—will win this year.   After that, I’ll pick “the field”—any one of the newbie participants—and Amy has to be the long shot to win.

(Happy, Amy?

And Hank, please don’t hurt me if you go 120 days straight, only to lose because of a bad internet connection :P)

- As the title states, there may be hope yet with regards to my XGBox/MGE rebate fiasco.  A few days ago, I mentioned that an individual from a forum I frequent got this response from XG/MGE:

Both of the checks have gotten printed. We will get them mailed by next week. Thanks for waiting.

Well, this individual reported to me today that he received his checks!  Does this mean XGBox actually intends on cutting checks to people that they owe?  Or do they only plan on paying a select few at a time?

I’m still betting that XG/MGE will send me my checks after 9/1/08, if they ever get around to doing so.

- Quickly, here are my Elite Eight thoughts:

1) If I were allowed to re-do my Bracket, I’d use a Magic Marker to write UNC as the champs.  They look almost unbeatable, and if Tyler Hansborough is going to sink outside jumpers like that, then other teams don’t stand a chance.

Don’t bother asking if this is another attempted Ung-hex.

2) Memphis looked absolutely dominant against Texas; I’d like to see how they are going to handle one Kevin Love, however.  Still, I suppose we can all stop the “Memphis is overrated b/c of their weak conference” talk now.

Hey Knicks’ fans!   How would Derrick Rose look in your uniform?

3) No thanks to an unnamed individual (no, not the same one mentioned earlier), I missed the entire first half of the Davidson-Kansas game.  Watching the second half of the game, I knew I missed a gem.  Curry took some really poor shots down the stretch, but I was really surprised that he didn’t take the final shot.  If you’re going to pass the ball for a game winning trey, why not attempt to drive and kick?  Kudos to Kansas’ D, though, and I’m sure they can’t wait to face former Kansas coach, Roy Williams.

And finally,

4) what the heck took so long for the Bruins to finally play a complete NCAA tourney game???  You had a feeling that Xavier was in trouble as soon as Westbrook made the game-opening steal and dunk.  More importantly, Luc Richard finally played a solid game.  I still have my concerns about Josh Shipp, Collison or Westbrook possibly disappearing, the total lack of a bench—James Keefe can’t possibly have another double-double in him, can he?—and Kevin Love falling in love with the three.

By the way, for those that think that this Final Four won’t be that exciting because all #1 seeds advanced, I wholeheartedly disagree.  I get it that people watch the NCAA tourney for the unexpected; they love teams like Davidson or George Mason of a couple years back.  We want to see #1s get toppled, and we want to see double-digit seeds live dream seasons, because the alternative is expected, and almost boring.  If all the favorites advance, that would be comparable to the NBA playoffs, where the best-of-seven format makes having the better team more likely to advance in the tournament.

However, isn’t the fact that this is the first time ever that all #1s made it to the Final Four unexpected in its own way?   When filling out your bracket, how many times do you hear “Never pick all #1s; that has never happened before!”?

(Tangent:  My sister, who still creamed me in the UngsungBlog Bracket Challenge, chose to listen to me, and crossed Kansas out of the Final Four.  Whoops.)

Besides, wouldn’t a Final Four full of #1 seeds mean that we fans will be treated to three titanic match ups between NCAA basketball powerhouses?  Don’t you want a huge dose of star power in the biggest games of the year?  As great as a Davidson v Memphis/UCLA championship match might sound, don’t you think a UNC-UCLA championship match wouldn’t be a huge draw?

Then again, if four mid-majors were in the Final Four, I’d still watch it.

Tags: Blog, Deals, Random, Sports by Peter
5 Comments »

Quick-hitters:

- Further proof that I am impossible to please:  it was freaking hot today!  89F in late March???  I had to take out my tower fan out of storage today!

(How do I know that it is officially warm?  I’ve found mosquitoes in my house, dammit.)

- Props to Dell!  I received my restore disks from them on Friday, via DHL Next Day!  Awesome!

- So, as scheduled, the first UngsungBBQ of the season occurred on Saturday.  Beef spare ribs, chicken wings and drummettes, grilled Italian squash (I had tomatoes, but we were already full before I got a chance to cook them), and potato salad, oh my!  My sister and mom came by and stayed for the entire weekend, and although the BBQ was clearly the highlight, that wasn’t the only thing that went on:

1) We spent Friday and Saturday nights playing various flavors of Karaoke Revolution for the PS2 as well as some Rock Band.  My Wii was just collecting dust.  We had to respond to our upstairs neighbors with their darn kids pounding on the floor above us all night, so what better way to retaliate than with horrible singing and loud music?  My mom, who owns a karaoke machine, wanted in on the gameplay, but I didn’t think she would have fared too well on Here I Go Again or Against All Odds.

2) My local Costco never stocks Mexicoke, so I asked my sister to pick me up a case earlier in the week; she was already planning on going to Costco, and I knew that the Alhambra Costco stocked Mexicoke.

Sure enough, on Friday, she brought me my case!  In exchange, I offered to file her taxes via some Taxcut software I picked up earlier in the year.  Definitely a fair deal, IMO, considering that I only had to file a single W-2 and a single 1099-INT.

3) Right before it was time for me to light the grill, I grabbed the bag of charcoal, opened it, and noticed something strange about the briquets in the bag.  Apparently, I did not buy charcoal briquets; I bought a bag of actual charcoal!  One piece was about a foot long!

(For the uninitiated, charcoal briquets are usually formed from wood burned at extreme temperatures in the absence of oxygen, and then the resulting product is shaped into the briquets we know today.)

I decided to try lighting the pile of charcoal anyway, and I noticed that it took a heck of a lot harder to fully light the charcoal than typical briquets.  The charcoal also shot off sparks every now and then, which was, admittedly, kinda cool.  Unfortunately, the charcoal eventually burned too quickly, and I was only able to cook off it for a few minutes.  A quick run to VONS to get some Match Light solved that problem, however.

Note to self:  Never, EVER, buy charcoal non-briquets again!

4) Oh yeah…there was also a lot of basketball on.  In fact, most of Saturday was spent watching tournament action, especially the UCLA near-disaster (more on that later).

Did I mention that the food was damn good?

- My NCAA tourney thoughts, Days 2-3:

1) #1 seed recap:  UNC looks unbeatable; Memphis might get upset by Michigan St.; I would love to see Davidson upset Kansas, and UCLA…

2) I hope the Bruins learn to never relax against a second round opponent again?  Look at their recent history:  a furious rally against Gonzaga in 06, a near-collapse against Indiana in 07, and now a near-upset against Texas A&M?

They better not be resting on their laurels against W. Kentucky.  To say that Mbah a Moute was rusty would be the understatement of the century.  Talk about a horrible game!  Eight TOs?  Good thing Collison’s 3-point barrage in the first half, Love’s fadeaways down the stretch, and Collison’s layups late saved the Bruins’ butts.

BTW, who saw the parallels between this game and the game against Gonzaga?  Think about it; we had a furious rally, a late lead, and a key forced TO.

(Tangent:  I know this is coming, but after yet another favorable call for UCLA—Shipp clearly fouled the A&M player on the Aggies’ last shot—I’m worried that people are going to start slapping asterisks on the Bruins, should they finish this and win the title.  The last thing I need is some New England Patriots’ comparisons.)

Does this spell a third straight Final Four?  Well, with Duke and UConn out of the tourney, I’m only worried about Xavier.  Am I looking past W. Kentucky?  Yes I am :P.

By the way, I guess we can officially start the “Goodbye Collison” and “Goodbye Love” clocks.

3) Two 12 seeds in the Sweet 16?  Duke and G’town out, beaten by WVU and Davidson (???) respectively?  League parity, or overall weakness at the top?

I’m tired, so I’ll finish up with this:

4) After day 3 of the UngsungBlog bracket contest, my sister is up (32/48 correct picks for me, 34/48 for her, and she has a three point lead on me.

I forgot to mention this last time, but here is the scoring system we’re using this year:

Correct picks in the first round:  1 pt

Correct picks in the second round:  2 pts

Correct picks in the Sweet 16:  4 pts

Correct picks in the Elite 8:  8 pts

Correct picks in the Final Four:  16 pts

Correct championship pick:  32 pts

Until next time!

Tags: Food, Random, Sports by Peter
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