Supersized Quick-hitters, And Customer Service Rants and Raves (Time Warner, J&R, Newegg, Discover)
I’ve decided to stay away from the latest Diva Favre news.
And the story about my horrible computer build will have to wait.
(Yeah, I’ll manage.)
Quick-hitters:
- I think I figured out the secret as to why diet drinks and protein shakes either work spectacularly, or not at all: they are intentionally made to taste disgusting!
(Have you ever tried Strawberry Milkshake flavored Muscle Milk?)
These drinks are so disgusting that you’ll either not want to eat anymore ( = instant weight loss!) or you’ll immediately go back to eating junk food after one day on the diet 
- File this one under “Quick ways to earn tons of stupid points.” Do you remember how your high school chemistry teacher always told you to never sniff the chemicals in a beaker/test tube/flask/whatever, and that the proper thing to do is “waft” the odors towards you?
I should probably have heeded that advice. Yesterday, while cleaning my bathroom, I found a nearly empty bottle of Tilex. Thinking that my sister might have added water to it (you know, add a bit of water in a nearly empty bottle of cleaner, shake it around, and you have a decent quantity of a dilute cleaner that could be useful for 1-2 more cleanings), I unscrewed the spray, and sniffed the contents of the bottle.
I have no idea what happened in the next 10 minutes.
(Fifty thousand stupid points.)
- So I finally have a serious gripe about my Logitech Cordless Desktop MX3200 Laser keyboard + mouse combo. The way my desk is set up (opposite the single torch lamp in the room), the media keys—next, previous, volume up/down, mute, play/pause, etc.—are virtually impossible to distinguish! Am I going to have to buy a small lamp for my desk just to make sure I don’t hit next instead of play/pause???
Too bad this keyboard doesn’t have a built-in backlight.
(Whew! That was long!)
Before I get to my customer service rants and raves, can you guess which of the companies I listed above are going to get rants, and which are going to get raves? Decide, and then read on.
- Time to rant and rave!
1) Thank you, Time Warner. Seriously. Three rate hikes in three months wasn’t enough?
I got an email from Time Warner saying that my next month’s bill was ready. That’s when I immediately noticed the amount due: ~$80. FOUR rate hikes, and we’re only in July???
It turns out that Time Warner is now charging a “Digital Programming Fee,” bundled into the cost of the monthly HD Set Top Box (STB) rental (now $9.00). They also, I believe, raised the rental fee of a regular STB to $6.00.
I’m probably going to have to cancel HBO. I wonder what fees they’re going to try to charge me this time. I know the downgrade fee is a given. Will I get hit with a “Live Operator” fee? How about a “Dial Tone” fee? Who knows?
(If you put Time Warner in the “rave” category, you must be smoking something. Can I get a hit of that stuff? :P)
2) So I ordered some free after rebate (naturally) software from J&R a couple of days ago, and two days later, I got a shipping confirmation. Unfortunately, J&R could not provide me any tracking info, or so their shipping confirmation stated.
The USPS Delivery Confirmation number on the address label of my padded mailer says otherwise.
(Huge drop-off from the first story, huh?)
3) I ordered a Belkin surge protector from Newegg.com a couple days ago. It was advertised for $9.99 - a $5 coupon - a $5 mail in rebate and free shipping. When I placed the order, I noticed that I was charged $8.25 for shipping and handling.
I immediately fired off an email to Newegg customer service, requesting a refund of my shipping and handling charges. That was three days ago.
I eventually found out that the free shipping was a misprint, a Newegg Live Chat CSR explained. The rep offered me a refund on my shipping charges anyway, and soon after, I got an emailed “invoice” from Newegg granting my credit.
(We’ll score that a half rant, half rave.)
4) OK…this one is neither a rant nor a rave; it’s just a funny story. I got a letter in the mail about a 0% balance transfer option with Discover, and for kicks (that’s my story, and I’m sticking to it), I called in to inquire about it. I had intended on doing a transfer in the $2,000-$2,500 range, and explained this to the CSR.
The CSR, who sounded overly cheery for a phone CSR, answered all my questions quickly and adequately. Right when I was about to hang up, though, she offered me a reduced cap on the balance transfer fee, which was 3% capped at $99; she offered a reduced cap of $75.
It took me half a second to point out that a 3% balance transfer fee on a $2,500 balance was going to cost me $75 anyway.
All the rep could do was chuckle and say “Whoops!”
(OK OK, we’ll score this one a rave anyway. So if you guessed rant, rant, 50/50, and rave, congrats! You win 50 Ung-bucks!)
Whew!
Your sniffing/wafting story reminds me of what happened at a Science Olympiad competition during high school. Chris and I were a team and we were to distinguish white powders by performing reactions and so on.
I handed Chris a 12M HCL and he sniffed and what he tells me is his sinus was immediately cleared. We’re not sure if any brain damage occurred.
Regarding your keyboard problem, have you thought about engraving or creating a tactile feedback like sticking a piece of foam on one of the buttons?
Since when does sniffing a bottle constitute a chemical reaction?
(Unless 12 M HCl + brain cells —> dead brain cells, which I suppose is a non-reversible reaction…)
Regarding the keyboard, I’ll probably tape tiny pieces of colored paper below the play/pause and mute buttons. That should help me identify the volume down/up buttons (left and right of mute) and the previous/next buttons (left and right of play/pause).
[…] Time Warner, you’re so funny. One week after I discovered you guys started charging a “Digital Programming Fee,” I spotted one of your commercials still advertising free HD […]