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Time Warner Sucks!

No, the title is not meant to be facetious. It’s the truth.

I had hinted about how much I hated Time Warner in an earlier blog entry, but I never did go into any detail about what happened. And then, the sh!t hit the fan today. But before I get into what happened today, let me discuss what happened on April 3rd. I promise you, this will be relevant to my story today.

(Sorry for the really long rant!)

(Background: A few months ago, my cable bill was a tad under $50/month for cable, Road Runner Basic high speed internet service (HSI), and a digital box rental. Recently, I’ve added HBO to my contract at $15/month, pushing my total bill to about $60-65/month. My basic cable is free of charge; it’s paid for by my landlord as part of his HOA dues).

I had acquired a Motorola SURFBoard cable modem to replace my POS RCA modem that Time Warner gave me. I called in to TW HSI support to get the new modem provisioned. The idiot rep, for the life of her, could not get my modem working. At the end of the call, she told me that my old modem would work just fine.

(FYI, in order to “provision” a new modem, a HSI company needs the MAC address of your modem–a 12 hexadecimal key. You give them the key, they punch it in their computer, and the change is usually quick.)

I asked her, “Wait a second. How would my old modem still work? Didn’t you punch in the new MAC address?”

Her response? Something like “It should work just fine.” Of course, it did, leading me to believe that she never correctly provisioned my modem.

Later in the day, I had another rep provision my modem, and he was able to do it within minutes. I thought I was in the clear, until I noticed that my speeds are pathetically slow. I called TW again the next day, and the rep insisted that slow speeds were perfectly acceptable (I was getting about 1 Mbps, when Road Runner Basic advertises 4-5Mbps). Eventually, the tech found out that one of the earlier techs had provisioned my modem for the Road Runner Lite plan (RR’s low-end plan, providing 1.5Mbps down)! He quickly corrected this, and I had my higher speeds again!

Fast forward to today: I checked my Citibank credit card statement earlier today, only to see an ~$90 charge on it from TW! I understand that companies need to raise their rates every now and then, but a $25 increase in a month???

I checked my TW statement, and spotted a couple extra charges to my bill: a charge of ~$16 for Broadcast Basic (what I’m supposed to get for free, or so I thought), and a “partial month” charge for $5.66. There was also a credit for a cool $0.24!

Mildly ticked off, I called Customer Service and spoke to an individual who insisted that the charges were all correct. When I inquired about the “partial charges,” the rep told me that these partial charges stemmed from a subscription to Road Runner Lite (remember that I was put on the Lite plan for one day). Never mind the fact that I was still being billed for Road Runner Basic–TW’s standard HSI service. I explained that there is clearly a problem here. The rep’s reply? Something to the effect of “oh, yeah, the system can add those [charges] at any time.” You could imagine how happy I was to hear that TW could charge me at random at any time.

Totally livid, I threatened to cancel all my services. The rep coldly told me “ok.” On top of that, he mentioned that there is a $1.99 convenience (read: bullsh!t) fee for each service removed from my’s contract! At that point, I asked him if he really wanted to lose a customer. He replied with “go ahead.” I had him remove HBO from my plan, and incurred the $1.99 charge.

Before I hung up on the guy, I asked him if I was going to be charged $1.99 for this call. In all seriousness, he answered “no, sir, we will never charge you for a phone call.” I told him “you guys probably will next month” and hung up before he could get into his “thank you for letting us rip you off…have a nice day” spiel. I fired off a nasty email to TW’s email support, and have yet to hear a reply.

(Yeah, I know, I can act quite childish at times).

After an hour of cooling off, I decided to call TW again. I got a really nice guy, who looked at the partial charges and thought I was getting screwed himself (insert big grin here). He forwarded me to another department, and I finally got resolution.

The rep agreed with me that I shouldn’t have been doubly charged for the RR Basic + Lite plan, so I got a few cents refunded to my account. I then inquired about the rest of the partial charges, as well as the Broadcast Basic charge of ~$16. The rep put me on hold for a bit, and came back with good news. Apparently, when I was bumped down to Road Runner Lite, that triggered a charge for Broadcast Basic service. It seems that I am supposed to get “sub-Basic” cable service free of charge, which is identical to Broadcast Basic except for the price (~$16, compared to $0). It turns out, that charge + the partial month for Road Runner Lite, added up to $5.66.

The rep credited me for the partial month of Broadcast Basic that I never subscribed for, as well as the $16 I was billed for Broadcast Basic this month. I asked to have HBO re-added on my account, and he did that, but he wouldn’t remove the $1.99 convenience charge. That was ok, though; somehow, he ended up lowering my total bill by $5/month as well!

I can’t wait to get next month’s statement, to see even more bogus charges on my account.

Moral of the story: apparently, I gotta speak to Time Warner twice to get a desired result.

Kobe Bryant? What’cha gonna do???

How do you call a $40 bet ($20 no limit) with K-9 offsuit, when you and your opponent have each only contributed $2.50 to the pot? When you know you’re going to make a king-high straight!

I don’t have the hand history, but here’s the hand, to the best of my knowledge:

Blinds $0.10 and $0.20.
Psycho raises to $0.60.
Victim raises to $1.50.
Psycho raises to $2.40.
Victim raises all-in to $40.
Psycho calls for $40.

Psycho shows K-9 offsuit; victim shows a pair of eights (the victim will win this hand about 55% of the time).

Board: QJTxx

Psycho ends up with a King-high straight (KQJT9); victim ends up with just his pair of eights.

Online poker…it’s FAN-tastic!

(By the way, if Dirk Nowitzki ends up winning the MVP award, can the award be taken away from him for a piss poor playoff performance? By the way, cool alliteration, no?)

- Sorry, IMBCers, but I just have to give my thoughts about this story on the Los Angeles Lakers. It appears that Kobe finally snapped, demanding changes to the Lakers for next season. This quote sums up Kobe’s feelings quite succinctly:

“Do something,” Bryant told reporters in Phoenix, “and do it now.”

Clearly Kobe is sick of playing with the likes of Smush Parker, Mo Evans, Jordan Farmar, and Andrew Bynum. No disrespect to any of these guys–well, maybe to Smush–but these role players don’t exactly resemble Horry, Fox, and Fisher.

(Tangent: Would anyone have a problem with my lumping Mark Cuban in with the likes of players such as Malone, Stockton, Barkley, et al., and coaches such as Jerry Sloan, in the “won’t ever win one [a championship]” Hall of Shame? To think, the Mavs were six minutes away from winning a championship last year, and now they’re about to be kicked to the curb by former Mav coach Don Nelson and the Golden State Warriors [!!!!!!])

Three marquee names are floating around with regards to the Lakers and trade possibilities in the offseason: Kevin Garnett, Jermaine O’Neal, and Jason Kidd would all make the Lakers better immediately. But at what cost? And would any of the three even make the Lakers contenders?

(Tangent #1: I hope the Warriors play Houston in the next round. I think the Warriors have a good shot at beating the Rockets, and I really want to see a Suns-Warriors Western Conference Finals!)

(Tangent #2: If a sportsbook gave 10:1 odds on Golden State winning the West, I’d have to seriously consider making that bet…that is, if online gambling were legal.)

Kevin Garnett, eh? Despite what T-Wolves GM Kevin McHale says–that he’s not trading KG–could he resist a first round pick or two, Andrew Bynum or Lamar Odom, and a bunch of garbage (Kwame Brown, e.g.)? While we’re at it, McHale could toss Mike James into the mix. Chances of this deal happening? Not much; it’s not likely that Minnesota would give up KG for that package. However, Minnesota has to think about it this way: they get a draft pick or two, expiring contracts, an established star, AND the good publicity that comes with finally allowing KG to leave Minnesota.

I’m sleepy, so next time, I’ll talk about Jermaine and Kidd. Until next time!